EXAMINATION RESULTS

The examination results are out! God knows how anxious i was before the results. But Alhamdulillah. I swear i didn't expect to get an A- for STA765. The paper has a total of 3 tests. The first two tests went well for me. But during the final test, i can only answer 2 out of 5 questions. 1 question was left blank. And the 2 other questions, i just tembak with whatever little knowledge i had. Damn. I swear i was so worried thinking that i might failed the paper. I even texted the lecturer saying that if i failed the subject, kindly please tell me what to do like extra assignments or additional test to earn some marks so that i can pass. And the lecturer just left my text with blue ticks. Haha. Crickets in the room. But no lie, i was worried sick about failing the paper. Honestly because i can't afford failing any other papers especially when i'm already extending another 1 semester for my dissertation.

And yes, i got only B for MGT790. I was expecting an A tbh because i like the subject so much. Another crickets in the room. Lol. But it was just not my luck. But hey! It's called Examination Results for a reason right? Because the outcome is always full of surprises hahaha. So overall i am really thankful and happy with my results. Even though it's not that good and i believe that i can achieve better but it is what it is. And Alhamdulillah! No more sitting for exams! Yayy! One hurdle away to getting my master's degree. May Allah ease this final journey. InsyaAllah. Amin YRA! Not forgotten, CONGRATULATIONS to all my friends who completed their master's degree already by now especially to two of my best friends, Sarah Yazmin and Anis Syafiqah. They deserved this so much. I am so proud of them. Alhamdulillah! May Allah ease their future endeavors. Amin YRA!

DISCLAIMER: I am not posting this here to be proud of my so so examination results nor being joyful of me taking another semester to complete (God knows how it hurts). Tbh, i've been in a situation where i was so secretive about me failing an exam paper. That i didn't feel the ease (at all) to go to the class, resit the exam because i wanted it to be a secret so bad. Nobody (except my closest friends) should ever know about it since i was so ashamed of myself. Suddenly everything was undercovered. Trust me, i've been there and it's not healthy. I was not happy. I keep on having paranoia attack such as; What happened if someone saw me attending to extra class? Omg my friends that pass the paper are there. Run! It was very sickening. The reason why this time, i don't want to keep it undercover anymore.

And the other reason is, i've always consider my blog as an open diary where i publish my thoughts and everything. My wins and losses, my sense and nonsense. People can read them if they want. You can read them if you want. And i know that i will read the old posts again someday in the future in my 30s, 40s or even 50s because that's what i did all the time to my past. And this blog will be one of the places where i walk down the memory lane. I want to leave it here. And there are going to be good times and bad times. It does for all of us. So lighten up brothers and sisters!

I'VE INSTALLED A WATER FILTER

I have been contemplating on installing a water filter for myself weeks before i moved out recently. You might be asking why do i need water filter? We can simply buy mineral water at 7E and everywhere. It won't cost us much. And yes. I don't deny that at all. But since i drink a lot like a camel, i don't think buying myself water bottles daily would suffice. My family have a water filter at home and my previous place at Shah Alam also got one. I mean, i am so used with water filters where i can make myself hot and cold drinks at any time even at 3am in the morning. I don't have to worry or stressed out when my bottle is already empty (my bottle is literally empty all the time) and i don't have to wait for the hot water turning to warm water so that i can drink a decent plain water. So yeah, it is nearly crucial for me to have a water filter. 

So i've installed Cuckoo King Top where i invest myself RM56.60 per month for it. Well come to think of it, let say if i buy myself mineral water daily for RM2 per bottle. And i buy it everyday for the working days which a total of 5 days per week, literally 20 days per month. RM2 x 20 days = RM40. Like, i only need to add up RM16.60 (basically a price for one Subway sandwich) and i can already get myself Cuckoo King Top with sufficient amount of water for me to drink. Hassle free. Needless to mention, only a bottle of mineral water daily is never going to be enough for me. I need to boil more water over and over again only for my daily drinks. Legit. And the decision is made, here a photo of my Cuckoo King Top, my new baby! Hehe

By the way, my sister, Syaqirin and my Kak Lin are both Cuckoo Authorized Agents. This is one of the reasons why i choose to install Cuckoo instead of others. The procedure was plain easy. Contact the authorized agents via Whatsapp, choose your desired model and price (the agents will list it out for you), send your details and a copy of your IC and debit / credit card, wait for the confirmation email and agreements from Cuckoo, confirm your order via text message and wait for the technician to come over and install the product. Worry not about the payment since Cuckoo will deduct it automatically from our debit / credit card during every first week of the month. Easy. No deposit, no additional charges and free service for 7 years. Other than water filters, they also have air purifiers and whatever. I already have my water filter so i don't really care anymore about others. Haha.

Oh if you feel like installing water filter or air purifier for the betterment of life, you can get it from the authorized agents; Syaqirin Norazizi and Lina Kamarudin. Doesn't matter where is your location, the agents can help to install the product for you. Just go to their profile and DM them. They know what to do. 

Aside from that, i can't believe that i did this. Haha. Actually, when the water filter is already installed, the water pipe at the sink should always be on so that the water will continually flow inside the filter. Or else, the water filter might be empty and heat up. Idk. I've already told my housemates about the valve position this and that. I even made a video tutorial on the instructions. Lol. But every time i go to the sink, the valve was always on the opposite side. So i edited these photos and paste near the sink. Hahaha. Yes i am that extra and overreacting. But whatever. This is one of my ways on taking care of my things. I mean, everybody is sharing the water filter with me. Why it is so hard to follow such simple instructions? Don't get me wrong. I'm not saying that my housemates are dumb or whatever. I believe that one or two of them were actually not paying attention to what i said. The reason why the valve is always at the opposite side.

As wise man once said, "A simple act of paying attention can take you a long way". Second to that!

50 FACTS ABOUT ME

This entry is literally inspired by Athisha Khan's YouTube video. I was at the office and let the YouTube videos continue to play by themselves and i stuck at Athisha's 50 Facts About Me video and like, yeah i should list mine on my blog too. Hehe.

Tiny Disclaimer: This is not a 20-minute-usual-post because it actually take days to list 50 Facts About Me. I keep reverting this post to draft until the list reached 50. I feel like i'm also learning myself at the same time cause sometimes, i don't even know myself. Lol and this is a long post, i suppose. So let's begin!

 

1. I grew up and raised at a kampung named Kampung Seliau in Negeri Sembilan (i still live here until forever). I get my first education here. My kindergarten and primary school are both at Seliau. I love how i am purely from kampung but at the same time, i also know how to blend in with the so called city culture. Like, technically i can easily switch my personality from a ruralite to urbanite and vice versa. I consider it as a bonus because i believe that not everyone can handle the kampung life (for real tho). One thing for sure, you can take me out of the kampung, but you can't take kampung out of me.

2. I am only 154cm tall (short) which is equivalent to 5'1". I am short but not that short. Also fat but not that fat. Please don't ask my weight. My current weight bothers me so much. It's too heavy to ... whatever.

3. I learned and know 5 languages; Malay, English, Mandarin, Japanese and Nogori. Hahaha (what even). I speak fluent Malay and Nogori. I don't speak fluent English but i can communicate well in English. I can write and text in English super fast. I talk to myself in English. My random thoughts are in English. My English accent on my mind is super cool but when i let it out verbally, it's ugly and awkward af. Guess i need more practice or maybe it's just my voice. I learned Mandarin during my Degree studies. And i learned Japanese for 4 years during high school. Kindly please don't ask me or speak Mandarin and Japanese with me. Because i don't remember the languages much and at all. Lol. But i do claim them in my resume because why not? Hahaha elementary level of course.

4. My fat rolls are everywhere from top to toe. I hope i can get rid of them at least before my wedding day. I need to make sure that i'm happy with my wedding photos #prayforafiqahnorazizi

5. I have many nicknames ever since primary school. During primary school, one of my friends called me Kepala Penyapu. I don't even know why. My high school name is Peaqox. That's the name that my high school friends will address me until forever. Most of Diploma friends (and family) called me Piqah. And during my Degree studies, my housemates called me Mummy for some reasons. Some of my friends never really called me by my real name that when they called me by my name, i never respond to them. It's just so weird. Haha. But tbh, i like to be called Fiqah instead of Piqah.

6. I have no problem on being single. It feels good to be single (i blogged about this before: Click here). But when i'm in love, oh darling, i'm all in heart and soul. And yes, loyalty is major for me.

7. I have only one sibling, my little sister. But she is not so little anymore. She looks like a bigger sister next to me. I'm simply grateful of her existence. I wouldn't trade her for the world even though sometimes i feel like killing her.

8. I don't drink milk, i don't eat cheesecake and my least favorite meat is lamb.

9. I like lyrics, singers, blogs, bloggers, poetry, poets. These are people that make words carry the world within them.

10. I'm not afraid of heights. I would like to ride on all of the roller coasters in the world and do everything related to heights. The higher the better. Try me.

11. I don't like people who try so hard just to fit in the society especially in the wrong way. For example, "Oh all socialites drink liquor, clubbing and eat pork. So i'm gonna do the same things and post it on social media as well. Damn i'm cool af". Like, honey, stop making fetch happen. It's not going to happen! Please, never forget our root. You are who you are.

12. I always expect for the best and the worst to happen. A realist all the way.

13. I have the weirdest, funniest voice. I kinda not like my own voice.

14. Although I have a lot of acquaintances, my real-deal circle of friends is actually very small.

15. There's no such thing as coffee or tea to me. I drink both. Anytime anywhere.

16. I love animals intensely and believe strongly in animal rights. We are the voice to the voiceless. Save the animals! Love and protect them at all cost!

17. I've never forgotten those who were close to me. Even those that opted against our friendship. I'm sure i no longer occupy a room in their mind and heart. Yet in mine, they'll always find a place.

18. Sometimes, politics frustate me beyond belief. And i'm not sure whether politics or the people that frustate me more.

19. It took me three times to pass Inferential Statistics during my Degree studies (used to be my biggest secret but not anymore since it's already in the past). It's the only subject that i've ever failed in my whole life. And i failed the paper twice! I get frustated just by thinking about it. But Alhamdulillah i passed the Advanced Inferential Statistics during my Master studies in one go.

20. I am a really bad procrastinator. 7 out of 10 of my assignments were finished a day before they were due. If that!

21. I am a fast texter and always feel embarrassed (and sometimes mad) when i reply in a millisecond while other people take forever.

22. I never experienced scholarships or any loan (educational loan to be exact) in my life. My only financial source is my family. My first ever allowance that is not from my family was my intern allowance. I'm still going to get my allowance from my parents until this September. Call me spoiled or sheltered if you like. But brb, getting ready for October onwards.

23. I used to bite my nails (i still do). Unless if i have henna on or after i polish them.

24. I don't like coke, soda or any carbonated drinks. I can drink them when there's no other choice. But they will never be my first option.

25.  I’m still single.

26. For a short while, I really wanted to be a stewardess. But it was not my calling.

27.  I can tolerate grammatical errors but it bothers me when i see words with incorrect usage of uppercase and lowercase.

28. I've never had my wisdom teeth removed yet. Maybe because they still haven't come in. Idk.

29. I used to play volleyball, netball and handball in school.

30. I have both B2 and D license. I first learned to ride and drive when i was still in primary school. Thanks to my late grandma. She is the one who taught me. She even once went to a roller coaster ride with me and my sister at Genting Highlands. I swear our parents will never go on a roller coaster ride with us like ever. My grandmother was way too cool. Al Fatihah to her.

31. My phone is in my hand 24/7. Unless when it's not.

32. Everything in my computer is perfectly organized in folders within folders within folders ... I also clear my browsing history and empty the recycle bin religiously. Same goes to my phone. Good riddance, no cache, all clear.

33. Sometimes, i overreact when there's no real reason. And sometimes, i may not react at all when there's a real reason to do so.

34. I have a quote / caption bank in my phone for my future reference.

35. I consider myself as a family oriented person. I love my family more than anything in the world. They are at the center of everything. It's sad for me how we got lost in our own schedules, more often than not, forgetting these precious beings. It's good to always reflect back and consider their feelings. No matter how far we go, never put our family behind us.

36. I used to have my own diary during high school. The most valuable one was the one when i was in Form 5. I still keep it until today. The diary was thick as a brick, hundreds pages long. Very dramatic but many pages were just left blank lol! Actually it was written for our English teacher, Sir Rashid. He insisted everybody to have a diary, wrote it in English (fully English) and submitted to him daily or at least twice a week. I remember his car was so full with students' diaries. Hahaha. He read the diaries only to check on the grammars and vocabularies, not the contents because he never commented on the contents unless when the student was depressed or gone through hell, he left with some advice to ponder. The funny thing is, during that time, everybody was reading each others' diaries like a magazine. No privacy at all. Hahaha. But thanks to Sir Rashid. I never really write before. And come out i really love the idea of diary and writing. One of the reason why i am still blogging.

37. "If i could turn back time" is the phrase that once in a while, echoes in my soul. There is this sadness that overtakes my being. I always wish that i could travel back in time and do many things differently than the ones i did. Especially with my late grandmother. And i am acutely aware of the fact that she's gone years and i find myself self-conscious about the fact that, despite this passage of time, despite all those years that have rolled by, i still feel a gap where she once was, which i can't quite find anything to fill. But at the same time, i also cannot go inside a black hole where time and space are said to change places. And yes. That's the thing about "life goes on". It does. It's just that you tend to still miss the life you once had. I just need the odd moan now and again to get me through.

38. I can't clarify whether i am high maintenance or not. Sometimes i am and sometimes i am not. From a scale of 1 to 10, i guess my high maintenance level is 7.

39. 40% morning person and 60% night owl. I can actually rock both.

40. I can't imagine my life without the internet. Life without the internet is pretty hard to fathom. We use it for virtually everything including to connecting with those around us. Even my mobile data is unlimited so that i can browse anything anywhere. Dear internet, never leave us. We love you.

41. I eat almost everything. I finish my plate every time. I hate those who waste their food purposely. Especially just because of crappy reasons. If you don't wanna eat it, don't take it, don't buy it. I mean, at the other side of the world, people are hungry to death. And here you are wasting your food on daily basis. Wow such balance Yin and Yang.

42. I can see ghosts when i was a kid. Like, legit. I had sixth sense. But the ability and the memory faded as i growing up. All gone now. My family told me that when i was in primary school, there's this one time when i hate going to school because i was seeing 'things'. One time i refused to eat because i saw 'them' at the canteen. I even claimed that i saw them here and there. Until some Ustaz(s) came to heal me. Crazy years back then. Haha. But i remember nothing now. And hell no i am not seeing ghosts on daily basis. Even though i'm afraid of people more than i'm afraid of ghost. But still, since i'm always by myself, let us not seeing each other, ghosts. Thank you.

43. I don't like dolls. I never play with dolls. I hate dolls. I like Barbie dolls but only on pictures. When i was a kid, i watched Chucky (Child's Play), the doll that comes alive and become a serial killer. It was so terrifying that i ended up believe that all dolls can come alive. Until today hahaha. Call me immature but i ain't taking no risk man. No dolls in my house. Ever! But i do like teddy bears and the other cute soft toys like penguins, chipmunks and all. It's just that, i can live without them. I don't need them. So yeah, i'm good.

44. I can nod off very quickly, sleep deeply, nap at any time and fall asleep anywhere. I have the ability to fall asleep within 5 seconds of laying down or close my eyes. I could fall asleep very easily and be snoring sometimes. Idk hahaha. It doesn't matter what the situation is. Working, vacation, super tired or not tired at all. I've done this my entire life and i have no idea. I need no sheep to count to sleep. And yeah, i don't have sleep disorder.

45. Call me old school, but i really value the three magic words; PLEASE, THANK YOU and I AM SORRY. I don't care who you are, what you do, whatsoever. These words are crucial in life. Say it out loud! Everytime!

46. I have Trypanophobia. Which is fear of needles or anything that involve with injections. I don't like injections. I hate injections. I never donate my blood because of this. I saw that people are so obsessed to have the fairest, pale skin that they willing to take the risky vitamin C injections, going under the knife and all like idk man. People are just out of their mind only for vanity. Like seriously in the end, nobody even cares.

47. I used to be so obsessed with lipsticks especially matte lip cream. One time i have about 50 matte lip creams with the same colours but different brands this and that. Until one day my heart decided that i don't like them anymore. And today i have only like 10 lipsticks but the most used ones are only 2.

48. I don't have that many clothes, scarves in my wardrobe. Thank god for the washing machine. I keep recycling the same outfit. I swear i wear every piece for million times until it worn out. I only shop when i feel like it. It can be like once a month or 100 times a month depending on my mood. I am not a shopaholic. I don't splurge much on clothes, handbags, makeups and all. But when i do, i splurge a lot. Hehe

49. I have no self control over food. I can say that i'm on diet for the month but already binge af on the first day. That's how critical my self control is. I want to change so bad but most of the time i just don't care. I think it's because of i'm still in my comfort zone of which i'm already fat but not really that fat. I don't exercise. It's funny how during high school i was kinda fit. I do push up everyday, running for miles, standing under the sun for 6 hours straight and all. But the moment i'm out, i don't even have a decent sport shoes. Lol. But i do have one now. One thing for sure, if anyone ever come to me telling how fat i am in a very annoying way, my only reply would be; "I can lose weight for free. You need about ten grand to fix your f***ing face. So Miley, what's good?"

50. I get annoyed very easily and on the other note, i am also easily amused. I too can be at the state of being simultaneously amused and annoyed. Very confusing, i know. But that's just me.

P/S: There are more to spill of course. But let's just stop here and thank you to those that read until the end.
Wow! I do feel like a widely open book by now hahaha. 

ANOTHER GOODBYE AND HELLO

 

Been studying together since 2011 until 2018. 7 years is not a short period of time. We've come so far. Can't believe we are all grown ups now. Alhamdulillah for the friendship. 

The view from my unit at Kristal View Apartment. I lived here for one and a half year. I swear i'm gonna miss this.

So 25th July was the day when Sarah and Anis submitted their hard bound theses to the faculty and mark the end of their Master journey. During the final night before Anis went back to Melaka for good, we had our dinner together near Sarah's place in Shah Alam. It was obviously not the last dinner for us since we are sure going to meet again in the future. So we were just chilling and laughing together while spending the night. 

The next day, i was out to work at 7.30am as usual. The only thing that unusual was, that was the last morning i'm going to say bye to Anis. It was so sad knowing that the moment i came back, Anis will longer be at home. We didn't cry to each other but the moment i hoped in my car, i cried to myself. I almost get off my car and go back to see Anis and cry together. Almost! But it'll be so dramatic that i know it'll just make me feel funny and might be one of our source of laughter in the future hahaha so yeah, thank god i didn't. Phew too much emotions in a day.

And so that was my last days at Kristal View as well. I moved out on the weekend, Sunday 29th, to my new place to stay. My sister helped me to carry all of the stuff as usual like, who else? My new temporary home is as nice as i expect it to be. What else really matter than a nice place to call home right?

I was and am blessed with nice, comfortable rental house ever since my first rental experience during my Diploma which at Taman Saujana Heights, Lendu. My bff, Sarah 'proposed' me and Paah to rent with her, Maryam and Fatin. It was only five of us in a house that can fit idk like 7-8 people for a normal rental house (?) Haha. The rental rate was just RM120 per month including everything. Good old time. I still remember when my late grandma was so relieved seeing the house knowing that i don't live in any creepy or terrifying house far from home. I still remember her face when she said "Alhamdulillah, ok rumah kakak" until this very moment (Al Fatihah to my Uwan Rapisah).

Years later, during my Degree studies, i rented at Taman Seremban 3. The rental rate was RM200 per month including everything as well. A brand new double storey house. Everything was literally so new and modern including the UiTM Seremban 3 campus itself. Fancy! We were the first tenants ever. There were 13 of us. Close to each other than any other 13 girls would ever be. I miss every one of them.

While at Shah Alam, Teho, Anis and i went out together for a day to find a house for the semesters. Well obviously we didn't know about iBilik, trovit and all yet at that time lol so last year. There was this one place recommended by a friend but it was rooms at the shop lots. Which me and Teho didn't agreed much because we don't want to just park our car here and there at the shop lots. Then we literally went to so many places near Seksyen 7 Shah Alam but no house really fit for us three. And suddenly Anis found a Facebook ads about the Kristal View Apartment. And the rest is history. The rental rate was RM220 per month not including the utilities. Roughly i paid around RM260 - RM280 overall per month. The least star awarded among all of the other houses hahaha. But still, it's a nice place to stay especially for more than a year.

For my current place which i've only and already stayed for one night so far lol. It's a room chosen among all of the choices that i've surveyed for the past months. This is the best (i hope) i can get for myself. And by the best, it's including the rental rate, the environment and whatnot. Every aspects is already taken into account. The rental rate here is RM600 per month. Fully furnished including the utilities and wifi. Additional RM100 for the monthly parking lot since i live in a condominium, therefore, parking lot is virtue. So the rental rate per month is RM700. I know it may be too much for a room for one person but this place is near Dutamas / Mont Kiara. I mean, what do we expect? I did found a RM350 room but a room that's more like a dorm that fits 4-6 people in one room. I mean, i'd rather pay more for my serenity than paying less but deal with so many people in one room and ugh! I swear this room is the cheapest among the non-cheaps. I also did found a nice room that cost RM500 per month. But the house is a mixed gender house (?) Which they are girls and boys staying in the same house, only different rooms. Crazy! I never thought that it was even real actually. 

I really hope that everything goes well here just like the previous ones. I know, every place has its pros and cons. There are even no two days alike. But as always, let's pray for the best. May Allah protect us all from everything and anything that has the potential to harm us in this life and the afterlife. Ameen!

I'm just gonna leave it here in so that in the future i can look back and like, "Oh, good old time, i remember how alone i am back then in that room" Lol. Oh, my boss, once told me; Never look at the unseen walls especially while facing difficulties because it will just anchor us down. Powerful advice i must say.

BIG BUMMER BUT IT'S OKAY

It's the end of the final semester (well, supposedly). Everybody is inhaling their last deep breath only to let it out and feel relieved. The dissertations are finally presented and accepted. All that left to do is to pray for the other two final papers to pass with good marks. And then, yes, Master's Degree is done baby. Phew, what a (one and half) year!

Excruciatingly, it comes out that i need another one semester to finally get my Master's Degree. Yes you read it. I will not going to graduate my Master's Degree on time. It's because of my dissertation. I'm not going to spill it here on how it happened, why, when or whatever since i already talked and cried about it only about so many times. Sad is an understatement for this. I almost lost my sane somewhere in the flood of my imaginary and actual tears. But it is what it is. I believe that sometimes our best is just simply not enough. We have to do what is required. And what's required is, i'm not going to finish my studies on July 2018 but on January 2019 instead. 

Extending the semester is one of my worst nightmares that finally becoming a reality. I know this situation is actually common especially among postgraduate students but still, nobody ever wants to fail a paper, not graduate on time, extending the semester and whatnots. Tbh, i already see this coming since around Ramadhan after such issues. But at that moment, i was still trying and hoping for the best. But then, yeah, never mind. It's done anyway.

Aside from that, since i am still welcoming myself to the world of minimum wage and started doing my full time job today at Mont Kiara (i have been working here since March but on part time basis), as a consequence, i already rented a place to stay for the next year or two or idk. It's a nice small room for one at a condominium near my workplace. Well, i'm not going to state the exact location here for i might have a creepy stalker (as if there's even one). But still lol. 

Anyway, isn't the room nice and comfy? This is the first look of the room i captured when i first came to see the place. Of course it will be differ once i moved in since i might exchange with better pillows, change the bed sheets or whatever that will do. Hehe. The place was already furnished with literally everything. So i just need to bring my stuff to move in. I absolutely going to spend most of my time with only me. So my sister, my bestfriend and AE will be the ultimate victims to my random, lonely thoughts. I hope they are mentally prepared for this. Haha!

 Consequently, i'm going to spend most of my time at Mont Kiara starting from now on and am going to go back and forth from Mont Kiara to UiTM Shah Alam to complete my dissertation next semester. I really hope that i pass the other two papers for this semester (Amin!) so that i can only focus on my dissertation and my full time job onwards. I know it's not going to be easy but may Allah ease this journey. 

There's a lot in my head on what to do, this and that. But i believe in doing one thing at a time. I didn't graduate my Master's Degree right on time because Allah has a better plan for me. I am already blessed with so many great things in life. Well, it's easy to pretend to be fine on the outside. But hell not on the inside cause i'm still trying to convince myself until today that it is okay not to be okay. But knowing myself, nah never mind. I'm sure going to be fine eventually. No point dwelling so let's move forward.

EID MUBARAK

I was thinking of trying to be cool with the pink shades but i ended up looking like an awkward lalat. It was such a disappointment since i've already imagined about this pose (with the shades) since the day i bought this baju raya. This photo obviously didn't pass to be one of my Instagram posts. But since i can't let this photo go unposted, hence, it's here. Thank you social media. I've officially lost my chill. Shame. And i really need to lose weight for real. Maybe now. Or maybe later. Okay. Double the shame.

Make up is always compulsory to women, girls (and me) especially on such occasions such as hari raya, of course. Oh, no make up guru or make up police should ever dare come to me and tell me to blend my eye shadows this and that because i've blended it already. Not your typical Youtube tutorial ways of blending. But my way. Hahaha. Ok fine. I didn't blend at all. I just put em on. Lol! I've been doing make up since as long as i can remember but until today, i never really know and bother on how it supposed to be done. I don't really follow the guidelines, rules of make up whatever. All i know is, as long as my face looks okay, then i guess i'm good. 

Selamat Hari Raya Maaf Zahir Batin.

RAMADHAN KAREEM

 Our favorite month is here again. Alhamdulillah for another Ramadhan. I always love the idea of Ramadhan. How i suddenly have a positively evident change in me, like how being patient becomes so much easier because i know it's Ramadhan and i know better reward is awaits (even though i am actually a short tempered kinda person). The feeling to supplicate is also more than ever because i know i will be granted. And of course, how it not only brings out the best in me, but also in the ones that i love and the ones that love me.

 I thank Allah for He always put me with those who are near and want to be near to Him. For instance, my high school is one of my greatest blessing in life because there was where i was molded to be determined and driven individual, as well as being a faithful servant. I remember one of those time where i was so damn lazy that i hate going to the surau to perform our jemaah prayers, to recite the Quran, Al Ma'thurat every Friday morning. How i was so lazy to recite the Al Mulk every night before the light off. But in the end, since we did it religiously for 5 solid years, i realized that i am still practicing them until today. Not every single day for i am not that perfect. But still, Alhamdulillah. 

 And it doesn't stop there since i am that type of person who will copy any act of kindness and good deeds from other people around me. If it's good, i will follow the act and if it's not, i will tell my best friend about it hahaha jkjk. My UiTM friends are also the ones that directly and indirectly helped me to be better each day. Ever since i was studying Diploma until now, i am blessed with roommates that never missed their prayers, regularly read the Quran and do the supplementary ibadah such as the tahajjud prayers. I admit that there are time where the devil inside me is taking over like no other. But when i saw my friends is getting ready to perform the prayers, read the Quran, i will get on my feet and do the same deed as well. It's the little things that make life big. And i genuinely appreciate that.

So for this Ramadhan, just like the previous ones, i really wish that i will be granted with Lailatul Qadr. I know all my life, with so little efforts that i have made compared to the others, i actually always get more than what i deserved. Alhamdulillah for that. But for this time around, i truly hope that all of my ultimate wishes for this Ramadhan are bestowed. These past days had been a time of reflection for me. I can't say that it was an utter torture since i can still handle the situation quite well. But it's still kinda heavy. Thus, i hope this Ramadhan will shower us so much blessings and provides solace and serenity for all. InsyaAllah.

P/S: Have a blessed Ramadhan, AE.