WAKEUP AND MAKEUP

It was a boring evening at the Postgraduate Lounge, FKSM when i scrolled through the Instagram and suddenly saw a post from a Make Up Artist (MUA) saying that she needs a model for a makeup class. I don't even wait for a second thought that i directly Whatsapp-ed her telling that i was interested. She told me to send her a photo (or two) of mine. And she will hit me back if i'm the one she's been looking for. And two weeks later, she contacted me and told me that i'm the chosen one. I was happy like, of course! Why shouldn't i? Only this one thing that makes me unhappy... The MUA told me to wear a shawl instead of bawal, my eternal ideal headscarf. I swear i never look good when i'm wearing other than bawal. I know most of my friends including my sister told me that i look pretty or okay in it or whatever, but i know myself so much. Cause i'll never gonna look as good as wearing bawal when i put on a shawl on my head.  No second opinion. But yeah, it's okay though. It's not that bad right blabla. 

So the makeup class was held at Seksyen U12, Shah Alam. Only about 3km from my house here. The class started from 10am until 5pm. From 10am until 1pm was the time for students (including my MUA) to learn about the makeup skills and whatnot. In this class, they were learning about how to do bridal makeup; smoky makeup and doll makeup. On my face was the dolly look. I mean, come on, it's obvious. The 'teachers' show them on how to apply the makeup with a demonstration on this one model. I swear the model looks very pretty. I don't know if it's the makeup, but she also looks kinda haughty. Maybe because of the attitude that the makeup gave her. Idk. And on 2pm onwards, after the class break, the students will do the makeup with their models of which one of the models was me. 

I swear the makeup literally took about two to three hours long. This is my second time a MUA did makeup for me. She took more than half an hour only for the eyebrows. Somehow, she did a great job tbh. To me, she was very thorough and committed to her job. I like her. In fact, i do feel pretty and different. And i do feel like a doll too. Except for the fact that my round face is just not meant to wear a shawl. So i still think if i were wearing bawal, i'll look better. Haha. Thank you to the MUA for giving me such opportunity. It's a win win situation because she was learning too. Which she was actually just experimenting the makeup on my face. But still, i looked pretty so it's okay hunny hehe. Probably gonna hire her in the future for such events. Maybe.

P/S: I apologize for not mentioning the MUA's name or tagged her in my Instagram photos. It's not that i don't want people to acknowledge her with such talent. It's just that, i have insecurities. Lol! She posted a before and after photo of me and the before applying the makeup photo, i think i look ugly as hell. I swear i'm not that ugly irl guys. I can prove that okay! I really hope that nobody that knows me will ever see that photo. Amin!

WORN OUT AND WEARY

We got a 5 hours Statistical Modelling test yesterday (it was supposed to be only 3 hours, but the questions were ugh so the Professor extended it up until 5 hours). Along the way while answering the "only" 2 questions, my only thought was, "I want this to end real quick. Please end this very soon. Cepatlah cepatlah penat sakit otak!". I swear this semester is way more tiring and stressful compared to the previous semesters. I am well aware about this semester since most of the seniors were whining all the time about how suffering the semester was. But actually i thought that i can handle it lol! I was wrong. Yes i said it. Who cares?!

I never wanted for the semester to end that much until now. I almost gave up that i wanted to quit my Master studies for real (just for a moment). I feel like the more i'm studying, the more i explore about everything, the unwiser i am becoming. But i'm not blaming anyone or anything about it. Since i believe that that is the actual concept of learning. Because every time you learned about something, there's always something else that you need to learn related to it. It's a never ending loop. Like, you might feel like reaching the summit but you'll never gonna go beyond that. Okay i lost point on what i was about to say. But, you get my point right? K.

As much as i'm tired of my studies, i thank god that He makes me someone who is firm with her decisions (Alhamdulillah). I always know what i want. This is what i want. I will NEVER gonna quit my studies just because of how slow learner or how sad and tired i am of everything. Though i actually really wanna quit my study cause i hate everything, everyone and every every every *screaming internally*. On the contrary, in actual fact, the obstacles actually doesn't block the path. They are the path. At the end of the day, if i get tired, i always need to learn to rest. Not to quit. I am not a quitter. I won't feed my demons. I won't let people being happy seeing me fall. I won't let people underestimating for a long time. And because of my need to know is forever greater than the desire to be fooled. 

May Allah ease Afiqah Norazizi's Master's Degree journey that she ace (or at least pass) all of the subjects, graduate on time, get a decent job, get married to a great husband, be productive along the way, be happily ever after and may Allah accept this Dua. Amin Ya Rabbal'alamin. 

Also, something to ponder:

“Barangsiapa yang menginginkan dunia maka hendaklah berilmu. Barangsiapa yang menginginkan akhirat, maka hendaklah berilmu. Dan barangsiapa yang menginginkan keduanya, maka hendaklah dengan ilmu.”